Skeletons No More

Posted: October 21, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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skeletons in closetWith Halloween around the corner skeletons seem to be out in the masses, But what about the ones that hide… You know the skeletons in the closet.. We all have them, you can be the mayor, chef, pro athlete, bum, or self-made millionaire but I can guarantee you have a few of these guys in your hypothetical closet. The real question is how do you let these skeletons affect you now? Or an even stronger question is how do others perceive you because of your Boney buddies. All to often we meet awesome people who just don’t allow you into their world due to something from the past, before I go any further let me clarify that statement.. I am not saying that everyone needs to be an open book because I would then be a hypocrite because If I were a book, it would be closed locked, bound in duct tape and buried. It takes a lot for me to let you in, and it is not necessarily due to skeletons but remember, We all have them. We can also ask ourselves why more people than not do not allow others into what they call life, Is it just because we are all selfish and want to keep “OURSELVES” to “OURSELVES”, I don’t think that is it at all, I think we all have the fear of ridicule or judgement from others. Now ask yourself before you judge someone for the PAST, ” Are you Perfect?” Ha, I think not.

I had a conversation with a friend who mentioned Skeletons and the possibility of people judging this person because of the skeletons they have in the closet and to be honest with you this provoked a ton of thought in my mind. How many times have you hesitated to open up or even just connect to someone because of your skeletons and doesn’t that basically make you a prisoner of your own devices?? Maybe I have a different view than some people do when it comes to people’s pasts and who they have become today. I do not think that your past labels you today, I do firmly believe that your past and the skeletons in your closet help to form the person that you have become today. Just like a last name, If the history of a last name labels who you are today most of us would be stage-coach robbers or slave drivers or…. the list goes on and on. But that is not how last names work, I believe that you make the last name what it is, YOU MAKE YOU, My opinion of you does not make you, the words I mumble under my breath about you does not make you it would make me.

When I think about the people who make be introverted due to the past that they have faced I realize that it is not the skeletons in the closet that are causing the closed feeling and the worry of judgement, it is the people who have judged the individual in the past. If you have never experienced judgement by another person you would have no idea what I am talking about but trust me I speak from experience, the judgment from a so-called friend or family member can hinder you for quite a while, and I don’t think any of us have the right to judge people about something that was done and put behind them long ago, maybe you are just what that person needs to get out of that hypothetical Funk they are in. Maybe just a smiling face, or open arms to someone who has been turned on by those they trust.

I think it is time to pull those skeletons out of the closet, dust them off and decorate them for all to see because your skeletons do not make you less than anyone. In fact in some cases those skeletons are battle wounds from life and it shows you went through life charging forward whether you made mistakes along the way or not you are “LIVING” and that is what makes “YOU”.  So if you are one of those that walks around with your head down and keeps your skeletons locked away, let’s get them out together and walk with our heads up and remember those worth worrying about will not get down on you no matter how ugly your skeletons are.

These are obviously just my opinions and things that have been running though my mind and if you disagree…… Excellent, take the time and turn your thoughts inside out.

Raymond

The Home Birth Of Our Little Man

Posted: September 22, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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I know that this does not really fit with the rest of the posts on my blog so far but I think it is worth a read. We recently had a home birth with our son and this was my take on the whole experience. Enjoy, and remember dont be afraid to turn your thoughts inside out.

What are the first things that come to mind when someone mentions birth? Well I can bet from a guys perspective it is completely different from that of a woman that is preparing to give birth.  When we found out we had our second child was on the way the first things that I started thinking about were things like, oh no, I’m going to have to change diapers again, a slow medley also started playing in my mind while I was kissing the thought of sleep goodbye and all of this while my wife was starting to research her birthing options and making phone calls to check on what she called “The Important Stuff”.  To me, making sure we had our closet stuffed with diaper genie refills was “Important Stuff”, come to find out, making the correct decision about where or who is going to deliver your newborn is a little higher on the importance meter.

We had a midwife as our provider with our first child but it was set in the hospital environment and seemed no different than having a standard doctor handling things, and since this was our first child what seemed like 490 Glucose tests and all these other tests that they kept requesting my wife go through all came off as a normal procedures and I had nothing to question. That is until we met Allyson.

I came home from work and Becky had mentioned that we were going to meet with a potential midwife and she had settled on the idea of having a home birth.  Okay, this is where the differences shine. She was all engines go and I was riding the brakes, even though I knew we had a very normal uneventful birth with our daughter the thought of something happening just kept lingering in my mind and then the more pity things like, umm well who is going to clean everything up and can I watch TV in the warmed birthing pool prior to the delivery?? What guys doesn’t want a hot tub in the living room.

After meeting with Allyson we walked out of well-rounded momma and got in the car and both said at that moment that we have found the right person. From that point forward every thing went great, we switched off having our appointments at the office and at our house, which is very nice when it comes to building a relationship with your midwife. You can verify that claim with my three-year old daughter who thinks of Allyson as another friend to play with. This relationship that was forged I think not only made things easier on us but it helped my daughter to better understand what was happening and what things were to come in the very near future.  When I look back to the experience we had with our daughter, it went something like this.  Walk into the doctors office and sign in with the lady working the desk with a cold, get called back into the private room and wait 25 minutes to see the doctor/midwife for 10 minutes with the first 5 minutes being them reading the chart to make sure they don’t call Mrs. Bryant, Mrs. Jones from the room next door.  With Allyson this was not the case, you can ask all the questions you want and go over all the “Important Things” until you are blue in the face and she wont be spending all the time she is with you rambling off random medical terms just to conclude your visit by sending you to the lab to choke down the worst tasting orange soda in the world, (I took a sip so I know). Everything was to the point and concise and within a matter of weeks we had spent more time actually discussing the pregnancy with Allyson then we did the entire time with our daughter, thus leaving us much more prepared for what was to come.

The day had come, first and foremost let me add, I should have placed bets at the local casino, I had told my wife that I had this strong intuition that her water was going to break in our bed and Isaiah was coming and she just laughed at me before we went to bed… If only I could have recorded that moment at 3AM when I was nudged and she calmly said, “ Um Raymond, I think my water just broke in our bed.” Now I in no way want to sound Cauchy but I may have well jumped out of the bed to do a touchdown dance because I was on fire.  We made the call to Allyson and she was at the door in no time ready to go with all the necessary items. This is when I was really able to see the differences between a birth with a midwife and the standard hospital birth that we had experienced with our daughter. As a guy I tend to try and compare scenarios to things that I can fully relate with and being a tattoo artist for many years now, I compare the hospital birth to a tattoo shop, we want you to come in knowing what is going to happen and we may adjust your original plans a little to better fit our needs and then we want to blow that thing out so you are not sitting in our chair for hours on end while we miss opportunities to make more money.  This is a mirror of my opinion of a hospital experience but what we experienced with this home birth could not have been more opposite.  Once Becky had gone into full on labor I was almost waiting for that update of, “ Okay you are at –cm” but it never came.  As time passed my mind began to wonder, “ so how long is this is going to go on, I couldn’t help but feel bad for the pain my wife was and right at the moment when Becky said she was done and did not want to do this anymore, Allyson calmly reached down and said, you can grab your son. Huh? Really? Is she serious? These all flashed in my mind at that second and sure enough there he was.

With all of her information and coaching through the last 9 months Becky had done it, a natural water birth with no medical interventions, in my opinion that is one amazing accomplishment and to top it off he was 10lbs and 22inches. I can’t speak for everyone but I think the home birth with Allyson beats a hospital birth hands down. The over all care that you receive and the relationship that you build while going through the entire process is priceless and could not be replaced by just another white coat. Thank you Allyson and Well-Rounded momma, we could not imagine this experience going any other way.

 

 

Being Controlled by the Uncontrollable

Posted: May 18, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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I have not written anything in quite a while but it is time to get back to it and lately the thought of letting the uncontrollable control you has been on my mind. I know that sounds a little out there and may not make complete sense to you but just think about it for a few minutes. Remember that time your car broke down and you got so angry you started kicking your tire and throwing an adult fit in the street, or how about the time you lost your job due to circumstances that were by far out of your control but you insisted on sitting on the couch and eating bon bons while feeling bad for yourself and in turn that would be allowing that uncontrollable situation to control you… Feel free to tell me if I am out of line when saying that we all do this at some point or another.

Allowing something to “control” you can be interpreted in many ways, maybe you are controlled physically, mentally or emotionally. Now if you are reading this and you just said to yourself, ” wow, you are right, something is controlling me” I am going to confess now that I am not going to be uncovering some long-lost answer as to how to solve this problem. My thoughts about this lead more to forcing ourselves to shed light onto the areas we are allowing to be controlled and maybe take a shot at figuring out why exactly we allow things to control us in that way. I know that sometimes I allow things that I have no control over like, when something is going to happen or when I am going to receive something control me both mentally and physically. For instance, something as simple as a package that you are waiting for sometimes controls people. Think about the last time you were excited about a recent purchase and you did not have a tracking number. You probably waited around your house instead of going to take care of other things just pacing and wondering… When is it going to be here while looking out the window every time you hear a large truck go by. I don’t care what you say, that is a form of being controlled by the uncontrollable.

What about more important things in life… Like, your bills, your marriage, your job, your kids. All of these things have the necessary things that we deal with and work for, but what about those things you cannot control, come on don’t draw a blank on me now.. That unexpected bill that came in the mail, that disagreement you had with your spouse, that raise you have been waiting for at work or those tantrums your kids have been throwing. Now I know some of these sound like controllable situations but when you really think about it they are not. I know that I have dealt with every single one of these situations and I may not have handled them the best but I know that I allowed them to control me in one way or another.

This is another one of those topics that can be taken in multiple ways and I want to make it clear that I am not in any way saying to just lay down and let all these situation just take you over and not do anything about them because that is obviously not the case. I guess what I am getting at is that it seems to me that it would be more beneficial to our handling the issue at hand if we actually determine the effect it is having on us. If you know that  you are allowing something to control you to the point of distraction there has got to be a reason why that specific issue has such a gripping effect on you.

To me it seems the hardest part of allowing something to control you is when you actually realize that something is controlling you. What happens then? Do we allow the fact that we are allowing something to control us consume us thus allowing that to control us as well. It is like a vicious cycle and if we do not actually take the reins and push through allowing ourselves to be controlled the cycle will continue. How do you break the cycle you ask? I have no idea, we are all different and we all handle thing differently but like I mentioned before, I think recognizing that we are allowing this is the first step to no longer allowing it. In those moments when you feel like you are being consumed and you can’t do anything about it, step back and look at just what is causing those feelings. It is all too easy to be controlled by the uncontrollable and is much harder to actually look at your situation and control the controllable which in turn may alter what was at one point uncontrollable. As you can tell, this topic is a complete flood of random thoughts I have had lately about being controlled by the uncontrollable and when I stopped to think about it these are the things that came to mind. You may think this is the most random pile of words you have seen come up on your screen in a very long time but I am willing to bet of you got this far, you have some thoughts of your own now, so take the time to click that comment button and “Turn Your Thoughts Inside Out.”

Raymond

Define Yourself

Posted: April 19, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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Who are you? Where do you belong? What are you meant to be doing? Have you ever asked yourself those questions? Most of us have at some point or another, that’s not to say that we have all come up with answers because in most cases we have not. I have read about people who have spent their entire lives searching not for a place, or an item but instead for themselves. This may sound far-fetched but aren’t we all searching for something at some point or another. Maybe you are searching for friendship, acceptance, Love, happiness, or comfort. These are all things that people search for daily and when you put these things together and mold them into the bigger picture in all reality what we are trying to figure out is… Who am I? Where do I belong? and Am I meant to be where I am right now? If you are looking for answers here I will stop you before you read any further because I don’t have that answer for you, but I can tell you that you do have the answers to all of those questions and more. They are all wound tight deep within yourself. I personally feel like sometimes I am too wound up in what society says is the normal and where society tells me I should be and what I should be doing and where I belong. Finally after lots of searching I have found that the answers are all within reach for all of us to grasp.

First of all take on the “Who are you?” question, Obviously who you are is not written up and given to your parents in an owners manual when you are born, instead it is instilled within you. Take a hard look into the mirror and look yourself in the eyes and ask yourself, ” What defines ME?” Who you are is what you let define you, that will most likely be different for all of us since I have yet to meet two people who honestly have the same defining characteristics or traits. All too often I see people around me allowing someone else in their life define who they are and this in turn is doing nothing but allowing that other person to deprive you of who you really are. I feel like a lot of us have grown to be okay with submission to those around us simply to conform to avoid ridicule. Is that what defines you? Fear? Fear of what may come of you if you decide to stand on your own two feet and truly embrace who you are deep within. In my personal opinion the only person besides god you will ever have to answer to is yourself and if you are not open and honest with yourself about who you are what makes you think you will be able to be honest with the big man…

Where do I belong? I think this goes hand in hand with the Who am I question, the first step in my mind is to figure our who you are before you can embarque on this journey to find where you belong. I know that is a lot easier said than done since that first step of figuring out who you are as a person may take months if not years of your life. Even thought I feel these fall in line with each other I also think they are two completely different processes that you will take to get to conclusion of each question. I know for me, this has been a long road to figure out where I belong. Stop thinking ground level on this one and go deeper, I am not referring to Geographical location I am referring to a total Where do I belong in Life? Yes I think for me this question encompassed my physical location for quite sometime and I think I have finally nailed that one in. As I mentioned before there really is no definitive answer to some of these questions and this is one of them. For example, I know that I am in Las Vegas for more than myself and my family alone. I am here to help change others as well, You can ask me what I mean by that and I would probably just look at you for a while and say, ” I really do not know, but I know that is what I am here for.” Of all places for me to end up I ended up in Las Vegas, one of the cities in the United States known for tearing apart hopes and dreams of thousands of people each year, yet somehow I know I belong here for good reason. When you end up were you belong in life you will know, It may not be a letter in the mail telling that you have arrived to your promise land, but your sign will appear and that is when you need to take the next step and seize that moment and make the best of what are given and always keep in your mind that all things really do happen for a reason, even if you don’t know what that reason is.

For me I think the question of “What am I meant to be doing?” Is one of the most difficult questions to ponder because I truly think that you do not receive the answer until your last few days here. Yeah, that’s what I said,” I don’t think you will know what you were meant to be doing until you are on your last leg in life.” Again, think deeper than the surface here. I am not talking about your day job… I know I am not alone in my thinking that we all have a higher purpose that we are here for and even when you get that tugging at your heart that you should be doing this or that we are wired to question it. Think about why we question things. It is not for knowledge most of the time, When you were 17 or 18 and getting ready to do something stupid did you question it because you wanted to know more about whatever you were about to do, or did you question it because you were out of your comfort zone? It was due to comfort. We do this when it comes to a lot of things in life, one that I have seen up close and personal is with following god. We become hesitant and almost begin to question, ” uhhmm, excuse me.. God, are you sure that is what you want me to do?” Ask yourself, why would you question that? I’ll tell you why I did at one point in my life. It was all because I was out of my comfort zone and when you are out of your comfort zone it is no longer easy to do and becomes difficult and we do not like difficult. So my thoughts on this tell me that when you are in your last days on earth you will see the things that you devoted your life too and it will either bring you joy knowing that you accomplished something and made a difference or you may look back and say to yourself, ” I didn’t do anything” and at that very moment we will know what we were meant to be doing.

Overall I think we are all searching for answers to at least one of these question when I think we all have the answers already and we just need to remove the clutter that we have scattered on top of them. The key to all of this is figuring out what defines you. Getting rid of the facade of happiness and really finding true happiness within ourselves is the answer to most of the questions we ask ourselves. Lets stop letting those around us directly or indirectly define who we are and remember that going against the grain is not a bad thing so take that step to start defining and creating the real you, because once you find happiness within yourself you will be able to honestly answer the question of who you are and with that answer comes many more. In my mind you must define yourself long before you attempt to define the world that you will call home because without a clear picture of who you are you will never be able to answer these other questions that rely on the real you as a foundation. So when that time comes stand up and take that moment and make it yours and don’t let anyone define it for you. You may not agree with my views on this topic and that is your right, and if that’s the case I strongly suggest you click the red comment button in the upper right hand corner and take the time to ” Turn Your Thoughts Inside Out”

Raymond 

The Small Things

Posted: April 18, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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I received a comment last night from the author of “Lighter Dark Side” and he wrote, ” It’s rare to find people caring about the small things in life, and this is what makes your blog a nice read.” When I initially read this I thought to myself, ” that was a cool comment” I then began to think about how true that statement really is. It is extremely rare to find people in today’s world that care in the slightest about “The Small Stuff” we also have different interpretations of what the small stuff really is. What is your idea of the small stuff? Is it a kind smile and a hello from a complete stranger or is it maybe the screaming sound of your kids running to you when you get home from work. It can be as small as having that trusty stick of chapstick with you at all times. No matter what the small things are it seems to be a dying tradition to really cherish and respect the small things. Think about when you were a kid and you had one of your first crushes on someone and you always wanted to do the biggest thing you could for that person or buy them the best gift ever but no matter what you do nothing will impress more than paying attention to the small things and getting something out of thought and not glamour.

We are all guilty of losing site of what really matters at some time or another. I read back over my blog after getting that comment and I realized how much all of my posts all seem to have this slight similarity and it is usually some sort of Good deed or thought of doing right by someone else. I am beginning to think that my “small things” are things that may be small actions to me but may have large impacts on those around me. Not saying this is what we should all be concentrating on but ponder how much happier those around us would be if we all just paid attention to the small stuff. Maybe your friend at work has been down in the dumps for some reason and in most cases like this that person may consciously or subconsciously make subtle comments about what it is that is causing it, but most of us go about our day and pay no attention to those small things. Even though by you listening and maybe doing one “small thing” for that person you may make a Huge difference. Lets go further than that, maybe your husband or wife has been acting different and it is due to you simply being busy and in your busy schedule you have not taken the time to see the tiny signs that they are showing that simply say, ” I need some attention.” Sometimes the small things like a hug or a simple, ” How are you?” can make a huge difference to that person.

This list can go on and on and on; But to me, It proves that some of the most important things are the “Small Things.” Lets make the cut just a little deeper now, what if we go through life only paying attention to our needs and ignoring all the small things only concentrating on what we think is important, would that be a joyful life? would it make those around you say, ” I want to be like him or her?”  A simple and easy answer to all of those questions is simply “NO”. As a society I think we look up to People like celebrities, and sports players and other “idols” of sorts. What happened to looking up to your Grandma, or your Mom, or your Aunt or Uncle maybe even a friend or even that stranger you just watched buy a homeless guy coffee and a blanket or what about the special ED teacher that gives all they have to educate people who in most cases get treated like less than people when In all reality they sometimes have a bigger heart than you and I combined. You may be questioning my thoughts right now, ” But Raymond, why would I look up to my family members or friends? They are just like me.” Well that is exactly why, they are just like you but do you not recall all the small things that they have done to influence your life and help build the person you are and the person you will become.

Take a few minutes to digest this all and then start thinking about all the small things you could be doing for those around you whether it be a smile, lending a hand, or just being there to listen to someone. Remember that sometimes the “small things” that you do or say have the largest effects on others so take the time to pay attention to life and not just over look the small things to reach big things because in that moment that you over look the small thing, someone may be down there just waiting for you to see it, in hopes that you may be that “ONE” person that takes notice of the small things in their life and makes a huge difference. As I have mentioned many times now, you may not agree with my thoughts on this topic and that is your right, if that is the case I encourage you to click that little red comment button in the upper right and take the time to ” Turn Your Thoughts Inside Out.”

Raymond

No More Settling

Posted: April 15, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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Dont settle For LessMy plan today was to be silent, not write anything and give it a break for the day but no matter what I do there is always something worth thinking about and in turn that means that there is always something worth writing about. With that said, here you go. I have been noticing a trend with people lately and yes this includes myself, why does it seem that more and more we are becoming okay with just being “okay” what happened to wanting to be spectacular or above par? Why do so many of us become complacent with the position that we are in? Whether we are referring to our job, our personal relationships, our spiritual relationships or simply our own happiness. I am seeing more and more of this, ” ahhh I guess this is it” attitude. My response for myself is ” No This Is Not It” we need to get up and do something about this lack of drive or lack of perseverance.

Really look back in history and think about if all of our predecessors took on this attitude. Maybe they would have said things like, ” Ahh, there is no need to build this railroad” and ” Who needs lightbulbs, we can just live in the dark and only have light for part of the day”. In a sense that is what we are doing to ourselves, acting as if we don’t mind being in the dark because it is just easier that way. Do you remember when you were a kid on your first day of junior high? Did the teacher walk into class and say, ” Welcome to Junior High, Here you will learn to push yourself to achieve half of what you are capable of and we will show you that it is okay to settle for straight C’s, because that is what your parents want for you”.  Absolutely not, and could you imagine if when you were getting married the pastor decided to spice up your vows a notch and say, ” Do you Raymond take this woman to be your wife on Monday’s, Wednesday’s and Friday’s and the occasional Saturday for Health and sometimes sickness until You decide to part?” Are you kidding me? Oh and one of my favorites, If you are a religious person imagine if you happened to be reading through the bible and you see a quote from Jesus saying, ” Thank you my son for half heartedly committing your life to me. He who is not ashamed to confess my name on Sunday’s and the occasional Easter and Christmas will be put on the VIP list at the gates because you have done so so.” Unfortunately I don’t see any of those situation working out. Settling for okay is more detrimental than just not doing anything at all.

I know that sometimes we do not mean to settle but it happens anyways, like that big project we take on and we know that we can get it done in just a few hours but it becomes tough and tiring so we leave it half done for a while and it may bother you for a week or so but eventually we become okay with it being that way and it is forgotten about. I look at this “project” example the same way I look at us as people and the way we just give up on our own happiness in some cases. You try to be happy, looking around every corner for the next thing to bring out that inner child in you and eventually it becomes tough and tiring and we just leave it and we think about it for a while and eventually we become complacent in our situation and never revisit it.

Once I started thinking about this and churning through my thoughts piece by piece I realized that I am guilty of this as well, we all are in one aspect or another but the first step to not being just “okay” is to realize that it is not okay to be okay. I have had the opportunity to meet some amazing people here in Las Vegas that are not okay with being okay and when you are around those people you know it. They wont settle for being mediocre in any facit of their life and there is always that obvious drive to succeed. One thing I do not want to get confused here is that If you are attempting to do your best and you fall short that is not settling to be okay, unless you choose to. The easy part is falling down, the tough part is getting back up.

I guess the point that I am trying to make with all of this is that we really are the only ones that can choose to not just float down the river we all call life, being okay with allowing the flow of water to drive our boat into the rocks, we need to sit up straight and navigate our path and if what we want is up river it’s time to get out the paddles and go against the flow, it will be tough and tiring but I know we wont just settle and pull in the paddles and let our boat be swept away with the current of life.

Raymond

The Word Family Does Not Mean Perfect

Posted: April 14, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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What does the word “family” mean to you? Is it a generic term to describe the people who are biologically related to you? Or does it have a broader meaning than that? In my mind family is not limited to those that are just biologically related to me, I consider my close friends as family as well. Some of us are on different spectrums when it comes to family, there may be some of you reading this that say, ” I don’t have family” and maybe some of you are saying, “we are all family” and believe it or not we are all right in our interpretation of family. The term family does not have a static meaning, It is one of those words that you can ask people about and get a different response every time; But I am not writing this to simply explain that we all think family means something different, instead I am curious to find out what people find to be the most important thing about family. In my mind, family is important both in good and bad.

Go back to when you were going into high school and your older brother or cousins or any one of your family members came to you with that classic talk, you know what I’m talking about because we have all heard it at some point or another. Oh, you don’t remember, let me remind you real quick. ” If I could go back to high school It would be so much different…….Etc Etc Etc” Do you remember now? At the time of you receiving that talk you probably did just like i did and blew it off, maybe even laughed and thought to yourself, ” Yeah okay, sure you would”. Well now that I am older I know that was not an attempt for that person to relive high school in their head. They were actually telling you that attempting to sway your decision-making and help you succeed.

Now, jump ahead 6 years to your mid twenties, you may have been having trouble with that special someone and you may have been all broken up about it or maybe you were not sure what to do. Oddly enough look who stepped in to talk to you about it, Family. As we get older it is almost like we begin to trust our family and the advice they give a little more each day. It may not be the advice that we always go with but we always take it into consideration.

To me family is more than important, you should be able to go to family no matter what the situation and family should be able to come to you with any situation, when you are down or in need family is there to help. Family should not look down upon you no matter what you are doing instead they should help in lifting you up. One of the most important things I think family should encompass is forgiveness… I know I have written a post about forgiveness but I think family can be one of the hardest to forgive. Why?  because I think we all expect family to not do wrong or not make mistakes when it comes to us but we sometimes need to take a step back and remember that the word family does not mean perfect and family is not immune to forgiveness.

I have been blessed with an awesome family that is not perfect because no family is and no matter what anyone says I don’t think I would trade them for anything. As a family you mold your young and instill morals and help to build the character that will stick with them and allow them to build their families later on down the road. With life today being so hectic and time based, I think we all forget from time to time to turn to our family and remind them how much they mean to us, even when a family member is down and not being the person you know them as, that may be just the time to extend your hand and help them up and remind them that you care. Everyone needs their family from time to time whether they are blood related or not, so do your part and embrace those around you and if you take anything from this remember, ”  The Word Family Does Not Mean Perfect”.

Once more, you may not agree with my stance on all of my topics but feel free to click the comments button and “Turn Your Inner Thoughts Inside Out”.

Raymond

A Song That Filled My Cup

Posted: April 14, 2011 in Thoughts By Song
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Most of the posts you read here are all Text based and tell a story of sorts to hopefully allow you to connect to me in a sense and understand my thoughts as a reader that can sometimes be tough depending on the topic. I am a very music driven person and have lots of thoughts in my head that are tethered to Music so I have decided to at this category to my blog ” Thoughts by Song”

This first song I am mentioning here is By the John Butler Trio. I had heard this song long before ever have a child and I liked it but it was just another song. A few years later along came my daughter and opened up an entire new side of me. The easily angered quick to take action Raymond was no more.  Once she came into my life It was like that half empty cup was always a full and when I would try to think about life before she came it was like I could not remember it. It’s like her new life was my new life and off we went. Now, anytime I listen to this song her and her mom are all I think about.

Thank you both I love you!

Raymond

Book Of Eli

Posted: April 14, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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The BibleOkay, so this is definitely not a movie reviewing blog but I watched The Book of Eli last night for the first time and all I can say is WOW.. Before I go any further I want to explain that I am not that guy you see at the movie store wearing my old Star Wars T-shirt with nappy curly hair asking the guy behind the counter what his favorite sci-fi movie is while picking popcorn from my teeth. This movie really made me say wow and that is odd for me to be that impressed with a movie. Maybe it is due to me trying to better follow the bible myself and really concentrating on doing what I am supposed to be doing with my life. I knew that the Netflix movie was going to be in my mailbox so I walked out to check it and there it was. When I unwrapped it and read the movie description I was not sure how much I would like it since they seem to highlight this movie as some action packed sci-fi movie about living with nothing and protecting a book, but the baby is down and it would be a good time to kick back and watch a movie so that is exactly what we did.

When the movie started I was still a little unsure due to the dark opening and lack of dialogue but I then started to pick up on all the bible references and the actual depth that this movie holds.  Are you kidding me, did I just hear Denzel Washington recite Genesis 3:19 in that scene? Did he really just teach her to walk by faith and not sight even when it doesn’t always make sense? The answer is yes to both of these questions and I was shocked. The other things that I noticed that may just be coincidence were that in most cases in the bible when you are the guard of a prisoner and they escape or get out on your watch you were murdered and that is what happened in this movie, Like in so many places in the Bible the guards would be shocked to find that the prisoners were gone and they do not know how and this happened with Eli and in the same fashion the guard says, ” I don’t know were he has gone, he was in there all night” and guess what, he was shot on the spot.

To go even further with the bible references In the movie you end up finding out that Eli was blind as is the biblical Eli in 1 Samuel.  Again my mind was running wild when watching this movie, the symbolism and meanings that I took from it are far beyond the similarities I have mentioned, let me run them down for you.

Once Carnegie realizes that Eli has “The Book” which we later find out is the New King James Version of the Bible, he goes on a rampage to get it. From the character building in the beginning of the movie is seems like there may be a glimmer of hope and that he wants it to help rebuild the city and make it a better place to live BUT later he makes this statement,”it is a weapon aimed right at the hearts and minds of the weak and the desperate. It will give us control of them. If we want to rule more than one small town, we have to have it. People will come from all over, they’ll do exactly what I tell ’em if the words are from the book. It’s happened before and it’ll happen again. All we need is that book.” I head that quote and my mind decoded it in to something larger. It is largely said today that people do not like religion or church for reasons like this, They are taking advantage of you… All they want is money… They use god to scare you… And what I heard was exactly that. Carnegie was that stereotype. Also later on Solara and Eli had a conversation about “The Book” when he had given it up to Carnegie.

Solara: I didn’t think you’d ever give up the book, I thought it was too important to you

Eli: It was, I was carrying and reading it everyday, got so caught up in protecting it, I forgot to live by what I’d learnt from it

Solara: And what’s that?

Eli: To do more for others than you do for yourself

This was a great part of the movie, because to me what he was saying was pretty plain and simple. He was concentrating on the book as a physical item and not the teachings of it. Solara was never exposed to the bible or any of the world before the flash that they continually speak of and Eli throughout the movie shows her what faith is and explains to her how he is doing what god had asked him to do.

Maybe I am really over thinking this movie and digging way to deep under the surface but this movie is actually pretty loaded with meaning and it ends with Eli Praying after completing his task of taking The Bible to the West. I will put the prayer that Eli prayed at the end here and you can put your own interpretation to it but again, it is loaded with meaning and I thought was a great way to end this movie. If only we all lived our lives like this fictional character Eli.

Eli’s Final Words/Prayer:

Dear Lord, thank you for giving me the strength and the conviction to complete the task you entrusted to me. Thank you for guiding me straight and true through the many obstacles in my path. And for keeping me resolute when all around seemed lost. Thank you for your protection and your many signs along the way. Thank you for any good that I may have done, I’m so sorry about the bad. Thank you for the friend I made. Please watch over her as you watched over me. Thank you for finally allowing me to rest. I’m so very tired, but I go now to my rest at peace. Knowing that I have done right with my time on this earth. I fought the good fight, I finished the race, I kept the faith.

Raymond

No Electronics For One Day

Posted: April 13, 2011 in Put That In Your Pipe and Smoke It
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I just watched a customer in our store get off of one phone call he was on and pull another cell phone out of his pocket to pick up another one… Instantly I thought back to my high school days when I thought it was cool to have my pager and Nokia cell phone the size of a brick on me at all times. When I watched him do this I almost put my head down in shame knowing that I had looked just like this at one point. After realizing that this is actually the normal now I started to really put thought to what life would be like without all the advancements in technology. First of all, you probably would not be reading this blog, unless It was printed in the Sunday paper and you surely would not be able to hop on Facebook and see what everyone and their mom is doing for spring break. With the technology has come an entire language of sorts. LOL you are totally my BFF sorry if that is TMI hold on BRB I need some water… And on and on and on. Don’t get me wrong, you can look in my iPhone and I am guilty of the LOL’s and BRB’s but 6 years ago I would have broken my thumbs if I knew I would have been writing this stuff. If you are anything like me and you want to be completely shocked by your electronic use, Look at your phone bill. I Have unlimited text messaging but we looked at the message count and I am honestly unsure as to how it is possible to send upwards of 10,000 texts in a month.

Let me give you my daily electronic run down, I wake up and use my electric toothbrush because it is just way to much strain to run my arm back and forth to brush by hand then I head downstairs to in some cases through something in the microwave for breakfast because waking up 15 minutes early to make real eggs and toast would be asking way too much of myself. Then I round-up my Macbook pro and my iPhone since I would not want to leave without either of those, what if I needed to check my email or make sure that I update my Facebook status from the bathroom at Taco Bell. After getting everything together and heading out to take on my day the electronics awaken, the phone starts ringing with my “good the bad and the ugly” ringtone and have you ever noticed no matter how off the wall your ringtone it never fails that someone near you whips out their phone and stairs at it for a second to see if it was them getting the call or text. I do IT work for a living so I am not saying I am mad about all the electronics and computerization of stuff because it creates job security for me but I would love to strip all electronics out of the hands of everyone for one 24 hour period.. Picture it, I will give you a description of what I think it would be like.

The night before the electronic shutdown you would be sitting on the edge of your bed thinking about what time you have to get up while winding up your alarm clock and then turning off your light by hand, No clappers here. The next morning you would see tons of guys with toilet paper squares stuck to their faces because regular razors don’t squirt lotion on your face. You may even make it to work in the morning without being cut off by the king or queen of “good morning sunshine text messages.” Now imagine this, it is lunch time at work and you offer to go pick up Starbucks for you and a coworker and you get all the way inside and you forgot the piece of paper that has the order on it. Now what, Oh I know, Ill text them… NOPE you have to ask to use a hardwired phone or use the payphone, how embarrassing. Now the fun part comes, you get off work and go home and you actually have to get out of your car and lift your garage door or just park in the driveway and walk the extra 10 feet into the house. What about when you get inside, you remember that TV you just bought that is HD, has WiFi and cooks you dinner all at once. Well instead you have a 13 inch black and white with knobs you have to get up and go turn and for some reason all you can pick up is re-runs of the Andy Griffith show and if your lucky leave it to beaver.. Maybe you can read, you know, a book with pages that you turn instead of swiping your finder across a screen. I guess if you don’t want to do that you may actually end up  going outside? Maybe not because the sun might melt us, maybe instead we could write a letter to someone or something, you know what I mean right? A letter, on paper, that white stuff with blue lines on it that you use pencils or pens on. This could go on and on and on, Electronics are everywhere.

I thought this would be interesting to share, think about your electronic use and what your daily life would be like without all the electronics you use. It is just shocking to me the changes and forward progress that has been made in all the different electronic industries in the last decade. Now that I have just gone off the deep end with this no electronic thing, I am going to go make some coffee, download some ringtones and make sure the DVR is recording Sons of Guns. TTYL

Raymond

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